3-15-05 Hello Friend!

Isn't this just the cutest birdie friend that you ever saw? Another great thing about Monterey, friendly locals. Ü
So, I have finally reached another epiphany of sorts. I am ready to try to go about life without inpatient treatment. I had a feeling today that could be described as confidence, power, relief. I was faced the past week or so with a proposition from another patient and I made and wavered and finally stuck to my boundary. That felt great beyond words! I made a decision that in treatment, I will not be afraid to "share" first. I will not feel guilty if I take up more time than others do. I am in treatment to fix me and if I don't do it, I will never get what I really want....love. I have to love myself, no ifs, ands, or buts, before someone else will be attracted to me with an offer of healthy love and relationship. It is hard work and often easier to help others with their problems than work on your own. I will. I can. I am first and foremost. "If the momma ain't happy, no one is happy." I want to be happy, more positive, healthy in mind, body, and spirit. Right now I am working on all 3 just on varying levels. Here's to a long, challenging road ahead, an extreme makeover of sorts, but I am starting with outer beauty and working towards the inner.